Here we are again folks another Soup ta Nuts episode. We are going to change these podcasts up a bit starting with this podcast.  Still real life stories from behind my bifocals, but we’re going to add some humour, happiness, and good-feeling stories, as the purpose of this podcast is to add to your day by bringing a smile to your lips and warmth to your heart. 

The real life story this time is about my going to a hypnotist for the first time to get some help with growing real fingernails instead of wearing those fake ones that I discussed in podcast 7.

January already and my body is still back in September when the sun was shining and the ground was still warm. My favorite time is in the fall when everything starts to change and all the blessings fall into glorious colors for as far as the eye can see.

 Fall means changes in my life too.  Some people wait until New Year’s Day to make changes but folks I like to try every season…so, if I don’t make the fall season then that’s all right cause I’ve got the winter and spring to fail and start again. Great for the ego.

This winter I decided my goal was to grow some finger nails naturally.  I don’t know if you remember my time with those false nails I called “hookers”.  They caught into everything and flew off in the most embarrassing places.

Guess I gotta give you some background about my nails.  I know I work hard what with eating, sleeping taking Cranky Cat out for a walk and I know I use my nails like those curved forks we use for the garden, and oh yes…I have been known to pick and bite them in a good movie, but after all…I just needed to find a different way to grow fingernails.

Now you got the background, so you’ll understand that everything I’ve tried failed—so my winter resolution was to go to one of those hypnotist people.  I saw one was advertising in this paper.

 I sure didn’t know what to expect what with all the gobbledegook you see on TV and I’ve seen those people on stage who seem to go out of their minds and do the funniest things.

   I expected I would see some lady with a turban and one of those swinging gizmos that go back and forth in front of your face.  I really did think twice about going  but my gal friend Pheenie went to this same gal to quit her smoking habit and it worked and it was her, honestly folks, that talked me into it. I told her I’d go if she promised to go with me just in case I needed emergency help.

  I called to make the appointment and told her I was coming to fix my bad nail habits. I was to go Saturday at 10am.

  I forced myself to shufflle up to the door my head down, slowly moving forward, but for each step I took, my body was arguing, trying to leap backward. But wouldn’t yah know there was Pheenie shoving me from behind. 

I rang the doorbell and a cute little old lady with a huge grin opened the door and invited us in and showed us to a beautiful leather couch a little distance from her desk. As I looked around at all the lavish furniture and office, I thought to myself that she must make a fortune, from us for helping us with our problems by putting us into some trance and perhaps even suggesting we leave her our fortune.  I told her I was leery about this woo-woo stuff and that I had brought Pheenie with me just in case I didn’t come to or anything.

  She nodded and asked me a few questions and then asked me to come closer and sit down in her hypnosis chair.  She dimmed the lights and asked me to look up at a spot on the wall.  Then the softest voice floated into my ears and she asked me to close my eyes.  I could feel myself relaxing still muchly aware of her soft voice. 

  I had been scared that I would spill some secret stuff when I was hypnotized, or that I wouldn’t wake up, or that I’d be stuck in la-la land!  But folks that just wasn’t what happened.  I knew that I could stop at any time and really I wanted to stay in that wonderful bliss.

  She gave me what they call a post-hypnotic suggestion that every time I took my delicious coffee with me as I went out to garden, it would remind me to use a hoe or small shovel to dig around in the dirt. She gave me suggestions about when I was watching a movie or I was in an emotional state to have a pencil handy that I could tap. 

  She then started to count slowly, from 1 to 5 and she said for me wake up.  I felt so good folks.  I thought I was there for about 10 minutes and guess what, almost 3/4 hour had passed.  She taught me some self-hypnosis to help with her suggestions and we booked a follow-up appointment in case I needed it.

  I agreed to try everything she said, although to be honest I was hoping she’d say to have some of my favourite ice cream ready or some popcorn when I watched a movie or got emotional and such…anything but a darn pencil!   Well I guess, after all, this was my fall resolution and I had to give it a try.     

  Now I know you wanna hear how the heck I made out.  Folks, I have the best looking fingernails in the county!  They work wonders on my Clem’s back.  I don’t play in the dirt any more.  I get Clem to.  I heard him grumbling something about fangs but when he saw me pointing at him, he just smiled and went on digging. Such a dear guy!

  Now for my winter’s resolution I think I’ll try this hypnosis thing again, this time for shaving a bit of extra fat off of my love handles. I thought I should report this folks as I know like me, lots of you might be scared of the hypnosis thing, but I swear it has been the best experience and to top it off, it works!  

 Before I leave I would like to share a few fun things for you to consider : 

 As I Mature!
I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just nincompoops.
I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I’ve learned that that you shouldn’t compare yourself to others—they are more screwed up than you think. 
I’ve learned that we are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.
I’ve learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place!
I’ve learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.

I hope I brought a wee smile to your lips, and a warming in your heart with real life’s happenings. If so, then my mission here, if even for a moment, has been fulfilled. 

I would like to leave you with a quote “Grow in happiness…and you’ll glow in this peaceful way. Your friends will be very, very happy with you. Everyone will want to sit next to you and people will give you money?” David Lynch, Filmmaker

I’d love to hear from you and if you’d like to send us an email to liz@lizunderhill.com and leave us a comment we’d love to hear from you and as our gift to you, I’d like to share a free book I wrote called “Flying By The Seat of Your Cans” 101 Law of Attraction Tips to Lead a Joyful and Abundant Life and Fulfill All of Your Personal, Professional and Financial Goals.

If you would like to be part of our show by sharing a real life story of your own with our friends, please go to liz@lizunderhill.com  and send us an email.  If you would like to be interviewed live, we would so like to hear from you too. Meanwhile, take care…keep smiling until the next time. Liz Underhill